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ASkyHappy

My first Animation, tips on what to change, how to make it better?

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Ok, let me explain and constructively criticise your animation in Animation Sins' style:

EVERYTHING

WRONG

WITH

ASKYHAPPY'S FIRST ANIMATION

In 1 minute or less,

If you read fast, (Duh,)

 

The background/scene is Mine-Imator's default flat land. DING!

But seeing this is just a test animation, I agree there is no point adding background assets. Let's take off that sin. !GNID

Herobrine. DING!

Appears to be the default Mine-Imator runing animation, or close to. Used in this situation, it's extremely lazy and looks terrible. Let's slap on 5 sins. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

AHHH! LINEAR TRANSITION!! I will take this chance to sin all the linear motions in this video! DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy transition from running to standing. There seems to be no inertia in this cursed world either. Why? It's linear. DINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy stabbing motion. He didn't even stab, he just moved his arm up and down. His sword barely even touched the zombie's shoulder. He looked more like the queen making the zombie a knight! DINGDINGDING

Accolade_by_Edmund_Blair_Leighton.jpg

"Hey, that's not a standing pose, That's just the default pose of Mine-imator!!" Yup. DINGDINGDING!

Oh, yeah, the same thing with the zombie. Pose, movements, transitions, everything. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

 

Comment: This animation needs some serious work, but everyone had to start somewhere. I Recommend watching AnxiousCynic's and Sharpwinds Beginner tutorials and start improving your work.

Edit: Stay away from Monster School, don't watch them and don't make them. They are a terrible role model.

 

Animation Sin Tally: 25

Sentence: So you have chosed death.

Edited by MojangYang

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5 hours ago, ASkyHappy said:

Hello,

 

This is my first animation, something feels off to me, but I can't tell what. Can you tell me what I should fix?

https://youtu.be/fYZP4QovaHc

 

Hey that a GREAT start my first animation had his legs floating away from the body! keep working on it an you will do Great keep up the good work!

34 minutes ago, MojangYang said:

Ok, let me explain and constructively criticise your animation in Animation Sins' style:

EVERYTHING

WRONG

WITH

ASKYHAPPY'S FIRST ANIMATION

In 1 minute or less,

If you read fast, (Duh,)

 

The background/scene is Mine-Imator's default flat land. DING!

But seeing this is just a test animation, I agree there is no point adding background assets. Let's take off that sin. !GNID

Herobrine. DING!

Appears to be the default Mine-Imator runing animation, or close to. Used in this situation, it's extremely lazy and looks terrible. Let's slap on 5 sins. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

AHHH! LINEAR TRANSITION!! I will take this chance to sin all the linear motions in this video! DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy transition from running to standing. There seems to be no inertia in this cursed world either. Why? It's linear. DINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy stabbing motion. He didn't even stab, he just moved his arm up and down. His sword barely even touched the zombie's shoulder. He looked more like the queen making the zombie a knight! DINGDINGDING

Accolade_by_Edmund_Blair_Leighton.jpg

"Hey, that's not a standing pose, That's just the default pose of Mine-imator!!" Yup. DINGDINGDING!

Oh, yeah, the same thing with the zombie. Pose, movements, transitions, everything. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

 

Comment: This animation needs some serious work, but everyone had to start somewhere. I Recommend watching AnxiousCynic's and Sharpwinds Beginner tutorials and start improving your work.

Edit: Stay away from Monster School, don't watch them and don't make them. They are a terrible role model.

 

Animation Sin Tally: 25

Sentence: So you have chosed death.

what the heck? hes doing fine he just needs to practice jerk!

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6 minutes ago, BLOXAR said:

 

Hey that a GREAT start my first animation had his legs floating away from the body! keep working on it an you will do Great keep up the good work!

what the heck? hes doing fine he just needs to practice jerk!

Dude, MJY was trying to mimic Animation Sins, so technically, MJY doesn’t want to be mean, but if Sins were here, he would be nasty. Common sense, man

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49 minutes ago, MojangYang said:

Ok, let me explain and constructively criticise your animation in Animation Sins' style:

Please don't. There was literally no need to flood the topic with all that unnecessarily-massive text.

Not to mention a lot of that isn't even constructive or helpful at all, and honestly sounds pretty rude.

Edited by __Mine__

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50 minutes ago, MojangYang said:

-snip-

that was extremely unfunny.

but the criticisms are valid just badly explained.

1.flatlands:
(would recommend checking out the scenery subforums for some schematics to use.)

2.linear transitions:

(try to experiment with some of the transitions so your animations aren't so abrupt.)

3.default run cycle:

(check out some tutorials for that, once you grasp the basics its super easy.)

4.stiff posing:

(try to make them in a more relaxed pose with rotations and bends.)

5.herobrine *cave ambient sound*:

(herobrine isn't really welcomed here as its a very overused concept.)

overall its not really a good animation but you gotta start somewhere, if you keep practicing and improving you will be really good.

:thumbsup:

Edited by Ian_The_One
dots

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It's okay, but it's better to cut the sword horizontally instead of vertically.
Also, if you want to make it more elaborate, it is better to make it without using copy & paste for each walk.

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Spoiler
On 5/16/2020 at 7:39 PM, MojangYang said:

Ok, let me explain and constructively criticise your animation in Animation Sins' style:

EVERYTHING

WRONG

WITH

ASKYHAPPY'S FIRST ANIMATION

In 1 minute or less,

If you read fast, (Duh,)

 

The background/scene is Mine-Imator's default flat land. DING!

But seeing this is just a test animation, I agree there is no point adding background assets. Let's take off that sin. !GNID

Herobrine. DING!

Appears to be the default Mine-Imator runing animation, or close to. Used in this situation, it's extremely lazy and looks terrible. Let's slap on 5 sins. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

AHHH! LINEAR TRANSITION!! I will take this chance to sin all the linear motions in this video! DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy transition from running to standing. There seems to be no inertia in this cursed world either. Why? It's linear. DINGDINGDING!

Extremely lazy stabbing motion. He didn't even stab, he just moved his arm up and down. His sword barely even touched the zombie's shoulder. He looked more like the queen making the zombie a knight! DINGDINGDING

Accolade_by_Edmund_Blair_Leighton.jpg

"Hey, that's not a standing pose, That's just the default pose of Mine-imator!!" Yup. DINGDINGDING!

Oh, yeah, the same thing with the zombie. Pose, movements, transitions, everything. DINGDINGDINGDINGDING!

 

Comment: This animation needs some serious work, but everyone had to start somewhere. I Recommend watching AnxiousCynic's and Sharpwinds Beginner tutorials and start improving your work.

Edit: Stay away from Monster School, don't watch them and don't make them. They are a terrible role model.

 

Animation Sin Tally: 25

Sentence: So you have chosed death.

 

Forums:
Sentence: So you have chosed death.

This is not a good format to use for giving someone who's new criticism. This takes up way too much space for the amount of criticism given, especially the first two points, which literally counteract each other. Also, this sounds very aggressive, as well as condescending. I can see someone quitting just because of criticism like this that makes things that everyone does when they first animate seem lesser to other first animations. 

 

A better way of writing this would be:

 

While flatlands are okay to use in tests, try to stick to scenery in normal animations. I'd suggest you don't use Herobrine, as the character has been over used and has become more unoriginal. As you become more skilled in animation, try to make your own run cycles. This way, there will be less foot sliding, as well as being more personalized to your animations. Linear is okay for fast motions, but try to use more ease in and out transitions in normal movements. Try to also make the transition from standing to running smoother. The swinging motion could use some work. Add some more anticipation before the swing and make the actual swing more forceful. When posing characters, make sure that every part of the body has a little bend and rotation. The default pose is unnatural and unrealistic. I suggest watching some of AnxiousCynic's and Sharpwind's tutorials, since they are very useful and can teach you some tips and tricks to become a better animator. Also, try not to animate monster school. YouTube is over saturated with monster school content, most of which is poorly animated. Making original animations is more enjoyable and produces something you can be more proud of. 

 

This takes up less space, gives the same information, and even goes more in depth to each bit of criticism. This way of writing criticism is much more useful than trying to parody Animation Sins. 

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8 minutes ago, TwoToRule said:
  Reveal hidden contents

 

Forums:
Sentence: So you have chosed death.

This is not a good format to use for giving someone who's new criticism. This takes up way too much space for the amount of criticism given, especially the first two points, which literally counteract each other. Also, this sounds very aggressive, as well as condescending. I can see someone quitting just because of criticism like this that makes things that everyone does when they first animate seem lesser to other first animations. 

You're pretty late to this situation, it's already over. MojangYang already realised his mistake, so it's best to move on.

16 minutes ago, TwoToRule said:

A better way of writing this would be:

 

...

One small problem with this is that there aren't any breaks in all that text, running the risk of a TL;DR situation. Adding line breaks would help to space out each separate point a little, making them much clearer to the reader.

For example:

Spoiler

While flatlands are okay to use in tests, try to stick to scenery in normal animations. I'd suggest you don't use Herobrine, as the character has been over used and has become more unoriginal.
As you become more skilled in animation, try to make your own run cycles. This way, there will be less foot sliding, as well as being more personalized to your animations. Linear is okay for fast motions, but try to use more ease in and out transitions in normal movements. Try to also make the transition from standing to running smoother.
The swinging motion could use some work. Add some more anticipation before the swing and make the actual swing more forceful.
When posing characters, make sure that every part of the body has a little bend and rotation. The default pose is unnatural and unrealistic. I suggest watching some of AnxiousCynic's and Sharpwind's tutorials, since they are very useful and can teach you some tips and tricks to become a better animator.
Also, try not to animate monster school. YouTube is over saturated with monster school content, most of which is poorly animated. Making original animations is more enjoyable and produces something you can be more proud of. 

 

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